Came across this on Tumblr and thought it was wonderful. Here it is in its natural habitat, but also pasted below. I’ve often found myself trying to determine his final thoughts.
The death of Thomas
I wonder if he was conscious or not after getting shot. He didn’t die right away, and he left a trail of blood behind. I wonder if it bothered him, that he couldn’t say goodbye to anyone. Imagine not leaving any message behind. Or maybe there is something hidden somewhere and it just hasn’t been found yet. I hope so. I need to know why he did it and I want to know why he felt that it was the most important thing to do in his short life. I wonder if he cried about it beforehand. Or was he just toughing it out all the way to the end? He was strong to be able to look at his father and say he was going out like it was just a regular day. When in reality, I’m sure he knew that it may be his last day and his last time seeing his family. I know if it was me, I would have crumbled but…That’s me. I also wonder about his drive to the Butler County Fairgrounds. Was he driving there in silence? Was he trying to hype himself up? Or was he just listening to music? And if it was music, I wonder what he was listening to.
I’m happy to hear that you thought my Tumblr post was wonderful.🥰
I also read that post. Very thought-provoking and nicely written. You may recognise me from Tumblr 🙂
That was you!? Yes, it really hit me hard and stayed with me. I wonder about moments in his last day, too; how he spent his time the in those 24 hours. Did he have trouble sleeping because of jangling nerves, or did he sleep like a baby knowing this was the last time he’d have to put up with anything? Did anything mundane increase in value to him when he realized it was the last time he’d ever see it? Sunsets? A bright moon?
Nina is so eloquent. I hope he wasn’t scared at the end. I think about it a lot, what his last moments were like. I hope so much that he was able to feel some kind of peace, or at least resignation rather than fear.
Nina what a really nice and well written post. I almost wanted to cry after I read it. I have often thought about his last moments. It made me so sad for him dying all alone on that roof. I hope he wasn’t afraid and that he felt some peace at the end.